Review: The Simpson's movie

If any of you are fans of the show, you'll know that the writers seem to have been on vacation these last ten seasons. So if you won't to know wear they went, it certainly wasn't anywhere near the script for the Simpson's movie. The movie isn't so much a movie as a giant episode. clearly made with fans in mind and with no consideration for people who have never seen the show (it might seem impossible, but I'm sure there out there).

The movie starts with Homer saying "Why would i wonna pay for something i could see for free" then points to the audience, exclaiming "all of you in this theater are suckers, especially you!". i couldn't agree more. I give this movie a No Brainer!

(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

This week's to Rent: Team America: World Police

From the makers of South Park, comes this politically incorrect puppet show. The world is being policed by super force, Team America. Their mission: Stop Terrorism at any cost! which leads to the Eiffel Tower being blown up along with the pyramids of Giza. this film is certainly the best Matt stone and Trey Parker have made as of yet. I give this film a skull!

Review: Pirates of the Caribbean: at worlds end

Sack Sparrow, and all those other no-names characters that you won't remember battle from one special affect to another. Disney's racist stereotyping strips away the fun of staring at CG affects. Will entertain the masses; but other then that, a waste of Johnny Depp's time. But its always nice to see that Movies with enough substance, well in this case fluff, can last more then the formulaic 1:30min. I give this movie a No-Brainer.

(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

This weeks to rent: Michael Moore Hates America

In honor of his upcoming film, Sicko, its only just that you rent this small documentary about a Man who is much like mike. His saga to get a 40min interview with the infamous Moore takes him across the nation. With a few celeb appearances, some excellent insight into the Moorist ideology and perhaps the most ironic reversal, this film is certainly an important view into what America thinks of Moore. I give this film a Skull!

(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

Review: Hot Fuzz

From the dults that made Shawn of the dead, comes 'Hot Fuzz'. Semi-funny satire of the Action movie genera; Detective Nicolas Angel is good at his job; to good. So his Co. as sent him to small English town. Now, Angel must get used to the fact that there are no murders in this quint little village... or are there?

Cheesy but fun, much like Shawn of the dead, its biggest and only problem is also what makes it so memorable; that this movie is not so much a satire then its own creation. Worth the price of admission. I give this movie Half-a-brain.

(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

This Week's To Rent: Rashomon

A murder as occurred, but each witness tells a deferent tale. The Bandit, the wife, the victim's ghost, and the man hiding out of site all say contradicting stories and with no clear answer. I give this movie a Skull.

Review: 300

300 is another Frank Miller comic turned movie, and its another instant cult classic. The over exaggerated story, based on actual events, show how 300 Spartans stood against the entire Persian empire. This film is shot in a gritty comic style, which works perfectly. Certainly original but nothing to sing about. Comic fans will adore it, history majors will shake their heads, and pacifists will be repulsed.
I give this movie a Skull!(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

This weeks To Rent: Gladiator

The story of a Spaniard centurion who, betrayed by his new king, fights for vengeance, a far better movie in the ancient Greek genera.
I give this movie a Skull
(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

Oscar Scam: a travesty in the movies


This yea, the Oscar went to The Departed, the half asked Irish Mobster film. Once again the Academy, long out of touch with the people, has tried to correct its past mistakes by making more mistakes.

Review: Flags of our fathers

The story of the men who raised the now well known flag at Iwo Jima. This movie tells the sad tale about how soldiers who did seemingly average duty are depicted as heroes and used by their government to raise founds. the story is sad, true, and not very interesting. Nowhere near the standard set by "Letters from Iwo Jima", but still a excellent film by Clint Eastwood.

I give this film a Half-A-Brain

(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

This Week's To Rent: Memoirs of a geisha

The story of a young girl who's parents sell her into a Geisha house, and sold into a life of strict servitude. Her only happiness comes from the only person who has ever shown her kindness, but her misfortune and life time duties as a geisha keep her away from the only one she ever cared for. I give this film a Skull.

Review: The Departed

The Departed is the lame gangster film about the Irish mob, and, its many rats and finks. Matt and Leo play opposite characters to the truly cruel and mad Jack, who is still Jack no matter what role you put him in. Leo is the poor, rough, and mean. A small time no body sent under cover to spy on a Irish mob boss. Matt is the good boy who was raised up by said mob boss and goes into the police to spy for the mob. and Jack is the mob boss, and, a FBI informant. The movie is a bit to dull to have been nominated for anything, let alone, "Best Picture". A lame duck film, could possibly be a cult film. How it got into the Oscar nomination, I'll never know.

I give it a Half-A-Brain.

(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

Review: Letters From Iwo Jima

Letters from Iwo Jima takes place in the late 1944, wear Japanese soldiers prepare to fight to the death. One powerful performance after another. The sheer determination of the Japanese soldiers to fight to the death, regardless of how painful and cruel their demise. This is a truly brutal film which is extremely historically accurate; from the cruelty of the Japanese drill masters, to the fanatic suicidal mentality of the Japanese soldier. This is a great movie, along the lines of "Saving Private Ryan". Easily Oscar worthy.

I give this movie a 'Skull'!
(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

Review: Pan's Labyrinth

Pan's Labyrinth takes place in 1940's Spain, were a Fascist Captain takes refuge in a old farm, and his stepdaughter is brought along with his wife. Soon, the young girl is told by a Satyr that she is a princes, and may leave her world of pain and hurt if she performs three tasks before the next full moon. Pan's Labyrinth is a beautiful, heart breaking, and truly unique film, with a deep, and dark ending, which leaves the viewers a powerful and deep choice; Do you believe the fairy tale, have faith, and make it a happy ending or is it the bitter sweaty delusion of a dead end.

Pan's Labyrinth is truly Oscar worthy. I give it a skull!

(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

Review: Children of Men

Children of Men is yet another futuristic Fascist oppressed British drama, in which their is, alas, a dictatorship in Britain, wear their country is the only one left after a futuristic and far fetched tragedy.

In the future, the world is ravaged by massive sterility. There have been no children born in 18 years. the protagonist finds himself being kidnapped by, who else, his ex-wife, who leads a band of rebels who fight for immigrant rights (in the future, England is being swamped by immigrants, apparently, a all-to-obvious political reversal). He sets out on a journey to help the expecting mother get to the "Human Project".

The story is bogged down with political messages witch contradict the anti-political story message that book tried to convey. Children of men is a gigantic missed opportunity, filled with so much potential, destroyed by political influence. it appears the newest thing in Europe is criticize America threw the "Future scenario". The Japanese have been doing this for decades, but White men in suits is far more subtler then this new type of political assault. Frankly, never sabotage a movie by making it more political then need be.

I give this film a 'Half-a-brain'.

(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)

The movie babel plays out a bit to much like and to close to the release of Crash to truly be enjoyed as it should. A far more subtle version, in the sense that the movie only has four interconnecting stories. Babel takes place in a small middle eastern village, the US Mexican border, and Tokyo.

The characters range from a two brothers who are sent to shoot jackals, whom in a dare, shoot a tourist. to the husband of the critical injured tourist. The baby sitter of their children whom takes them to Mexico for a birthday and the def-mute daughter of the hunter who gave his gun to the father of the two boys.

The story is the rare combination of subtle but powerful. with excellent acting, babel is easily a memorable soon to be classic.

I give this movie a Skull

(Rating system: No Brainer = Bad, Half-a-brain = Ok, Skull = great)